Czille

once more, i am in one of my life’s crossroads. it is when i fell that i flew; when i laughed, that i choked; when i cried, that i felt released… how does one keep holding on when the other is letting go? how does one feel secure in her position when she is just among several options? how does one say he loves you and happy being with you and at the same time, doesn’t consider a future together? well… many of these are cliches, jagged, over-used, lame… but all the same, these experiences seem like new everytime it hits someone.

why do these situations seem like recycled melodramas? it already appears to me like scripted telenovelas which the writer/directors ran out of more original plots.

i should say i’ve been there, done that… I’m a veteran in the rejection circus and the rollercoaster ride of heartbreaks, deceptions, lies, that i should already know what happens next…

but i guess i do… sometimes, there is still that unavoidable portion called "denial stage". Couldn’t help it when you didn’t see it coming… when you thought you are dancing in the colorful flowery meadow, basking in the bright summer sun without getting a sunburn, when all of a sudden, everything goes blank… then you realized it was just a screen saver in my computer… (remember that joke played on the poor soul who chose a beautiful screensaver and unwittingly chose hell?) 

well… the judgment day isn’t here yet. I’m waiting for it… I’m a survivor and i will survive some more… Bring it on! 

This entry was posted on Monday, March 26th, 2007 at 10:27 pm and is filed under personals. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.